Why I Would Never Write My Love Story.

Because it is stupid!   Love is stupid!  It makes you do dumb things that are not logical.  And that is not how a story with any depth should be written.    A good story.   A LOGICAL story makes sense and has purpose.  A Direction!   And a happy ending.  And life... All life... Has an ending that should be happy.  Otherwise it is a tragedy   Not a "romantic" comedy.    No part of the formula where the couple break up over the dumbest of things only to forgive and get back together.   Who reads this Stuff?

And so it goes that I called Cheryl tonight... the first Christmas in the last 27 years where we have not spent together.  Why did I do it?   Why did I say those things?   Cringe!  Once the genie is out of the bottle... you can never put  it back.   And perhaps that is the Brandy and Rum talking...... But while I'm writing this...  The ELO song "I need her Love" comes on and throws me a  curve ball!  Why? 

 

Do the Lyrics apply to me?   I don't know... but they hint at my problem.  

As a writer, I would make the lovers fall in love against all odds and find the true love that evades us all.  There would be no tension that tears them apart only to patch things back up and get back together.   Those stories are written for the Female psyche.   They make no sense. 

And for that reason, I would write a story where the lovers fall in love and have to face hardship before they finally get together.   And then live happily ever after.   They have already struggled through the darkness to finally be together.   Why would they throw that all away? All those memories and hardships that they overcame together.... Why?   How?  How did that happen that would separate them after they had to work so hard to get  together.   That!.... Is a dumb story. 

Perhaps it was the Christmas Eve depression.   Am I depressed?  Maybe....  A little.  But why do I do the things that throw reason and logic out the window?   Am I really that kind of guy?   Stupid Stupid!

Calm down...  Was it really all that bad?  Probably not.   But it does show a moment of weakness ( Or inebriation) that makes me wish I had not done what I did.  Which makes me think of the other ELO song that came on.   Was the universe trying to tell me something?  Perhaps.   You be the judge. 

 

And so it goes that I will be spending Christmas Eve Alone...   And the discovery that I was not as strong-willed as I thought I was.   Foolish!  Foolish!  Why are men so weak?  

I have to find a way to stop this.   I don't know why.  And perhaps the holidays are making things more complicated than they should be.   I should be able to navigate this stormy patch, but I find myself in a sinking vessels.  Time to start bailing and make for shallower waters.  Because every second counts!